On Thursday morning, as I was driving in to work I had a plan in mind. I had given a friend at work some coupons for buy-one-get-one-free breakfast sandwiches, and I wanted her to stop for breakfast before she came in to work so I could have one. The real part of the plan was that I wanted to purge again. I have gone nearly a week, and I only agreed not to throw up TWO meals a day, so I could still eat two more meals that day, get my minimum 800 calories and nobody would know the difference.
When I was about halfway to work, my car started to vibrate. I immediately thought "I must have a flat tire" and pulled over. When I put the car in park, I saw smoke coming out the front and assumed it was more than a flat. I didn't get out of the car, I kind of started to panic so I called Aaron, and then our travel club, and then sent a text to my boss because I figured I'd be late. My boss told me he was on his way to help me out. As I sat there waiting for the tow truck, and my boss, a Utah Highway Patrol office pulled over (only seconds before my boss showed up) and asked me if I had a spare tire. I was so embarrassed because I hadn't checked the tires, even though it had been my first thought. I told him "there was smoke coming out the front, and the tire is in the back." he pointed out the wind was blowing that direction, so that's why the smoke looked like it was coming out the front.
Well, I was pretty embarrassed that my boss (and another manager from work) had driven so far to help me for no reason at all. Not to mention that I had ignored my first instincts about it being a flat tire, and I was now very late to work and I knew that several more people would hear about the stupid mistake I had made.
It was OK, I learned to laugh it off. Everybody makes mistakes, and if it made people laugh then that was fine.
When the previously mentioned co-worker showed up, I suddenly remembered my plan. At first I was disappointed I wouldn't be able to purge breakfast because there was nothing to purge. As I drove home on my "donut" tire I started to think about it. I knew that, once again, angels were watching over me. I got so distracted by the stupid tire incident and all the laughs and jokes at my mistake that I forgot all about it. I know it sounds crazy (most of what I say seems crazy lately) but I really think it all happened to distract me from wanting to purge. If I start again, it will only be the beginning and I will remember how much I enjoyed it, and start doing it more often again. I have gone a full week without it, and while part of me misses it, another part is proud that I have come this far in so little time.
I have decided not to look for loopholes in the deal I made. I am going to stick to it, and be 100% honest about everything that goes on. I am thankful for guardian angels. I am very blessed.
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